Taking the bêtes noires for a walk

[steepholm]

My health regime will henceforth pay much more attention to innards. Hence my new mottos: "Ten minutes' splenetics in the morning - the way to a healthy spleen!" "Never go more than a day without evacuating your bile!" In pursuit whereof...

All those Scots in the cabinet have a lot to answer for, linguistically speaking. Take "Not fit for purpose". I think it was John Reid who, as Home Secretary, first introduced this phrase into political currency, just three years ago. Now, it has spread like swine flu. Meanwhile, "proven" has more or less displaced "proved", a giant Scottish grey squirrel muscling out the native population of participles. Politicians like these phrases because it makes them sound like reliable Edinburgh lawyers, or Dr Cameron in Dr Finlay's Casebook, but I think they're just naff, especially when spoken in the designer-glottallized English of southern MPs.

Then this morning I heard someone calling for a "sea change" in policy on city bonuses. I was momentarily charmed by the Shakespearian allusion, picturing rich and strange bankers covered in coral like Phlebas the Phoenician; but he soon succumbed to the tidal pull of the political demotic, and long before the end of the interview the sea change had become a "step change", which is now the only acceptable way for politicians to refer to a decisive change of direction. What is a "step change" anyway? A dancing term? When you go from waltz to rumba? I don't know, and I doubt they do either.

I never thought I'd feel nostalgic for the good old quantum leap.

And I long ago gave up on "a whole raft of measures". "Raft" in the sense of "a lot" is an Americanism, I think, but one that in this country is only ever used in this particular phrase, and thus inevitably conjures a heap of rulers, plumb lines and quadrants floating out to sea. Sometimes one hears of a "whole range of measures" instead, but either way, what does the "whole" bit mean? What would half a range (or raft) look like?

Okay, now I'm just being grumpy - and my splenetics session is nearly over. I'll finish by pointing to this very interesting piece on an old favourite of mine, which demonstrates that the importance of this mistake in logic cannot be undererestimated. Or can it?

Comments

[hafren.livejournal.com]

I get mad about people who are constantly stepping up to the plate, or urging others to do so. I believe it's a sporting term, from some version of rounders, but I don't see why I should be expected to have any idea what it means.

Aeons ago when I was in the civil service, we were brought up on Ernest Gowers' Plain Words, and I still fondly recall his dry examples of how not to do it:

Any archer will tell you that to exceed a target is as bad as falling short of it.

Do not use "anticipate" as a synonym for "expected". "John and Jane anticipated marriage" does not mean "John and Jane expected to get married."

Do not tell your correspondents that "the Minister is not in a position to accede to this request.". This will only tempt them to suggest he try standing on his head and see if that makes any difference.

And my own current favourite, after getting this morning's mail: Do not use paper stamped "date as postmark". This says to the recipient; "I am far too busy to know what the date is, or to write it down if I did. If you want to know it, you must retrieve the envelope from the waste paper basket and decipher the postmark,if you can. It is better you should do this than that I should be inconvenienced even for a moment.

[steepholm.livejournal.com]

The datemark one is very annoying, especially it's illegible as often as not!

(Punctuation is the courtesy of the King's English. There's another motto in that, somewhere.)

[a-d-medievalist.livejournal.com]

I haven't ever heard anybody use 'raft of' except in UK media, and it also evokes the same images for me :-)

Is 'proven' not a really acceptable participle?

What is the past tense of 'to dive'? I say 'dove', but many people here say 'dived', as if it's not a strong verb.

I know exactly what stepping up to the plate means, btw, but am not sure why it is used so often as a metaphor.

[steepholm.livejournal.com]

Proven is perfectly acceptable (as in the Scottish verdict of 'Not Proven'), but it's only become prevalent in the last few years in England, I think. Rightly or wrongly, I associate this with the dominance of Scots in the political class, and the way people - not just politicians - tend to ape the language of power.

"Dove" is definitely not standard British English, though possibly it exists in some British dialects. "Dive" a regular verb here. As is "fit": I'm always caught out by "fit" used as an imperfect, too.

As for stepping up to the plate...

[hafren.livejournal.com]

Thrive and strive though, are strong verbs, and you wouldn't know it from the newspapers, who are constantly referring, especially on the sports pages, to some team having strived and, as often as not, thrived. (After which, no doubt, they got on the team bus and drived home).

[a-d-medievalist.livejournal.com]

:-)

[ladyofastolat.livejournal.com]

I always notice "rolled out". I could be wrong, but I certainly think of it as government jargon. A few years ago, when Bookstart (the scheme that gives free books to babies and toddlers) was being extended, we were told to tell enquiring public that the books were being rolled out across the country over the next few months, which created a very nice image in my mind.

Someone I work with is very good at using phrases like this, but even better at getting them wrong. He talks about going through documents with a fine tooth-comb, but he's hardly alone in this. His best, though, was when he said that staff "really had the bit beneath their belt and were turning up the volume." I think this was considered a good thing.

Many Morris dances have step changes, perhaps going from a double-step in the figure to a series of capers in the chorus. A step change in city bonuses therefore probably consists of six Cotswold Morris men, ceremonially dancing on the people who received them, while their Fool hits them with a bladder.

[steepholm.livejournal.com]

A step change in city bonuses therefore probably consists of six Cotswold Morris men, ceremonially dancing on the people who received them, while their Fool hits them with a bladder.

One can dream!

[dru-marland.livejournal.com]

When I hear "raft of measures" it makes me think of "shit on a raft", which probably means I spent too long at sea, where they eat such appealing fodder.

[steepholm.livejournal.com]

So that's why I never ran away to sea to be a sailor...

[calimac.livejournal.com]

"Raft" doesn't mean "a lot" but "a whole raft" does. Yeah, probably an Americanism, insofar as I've seen it used here.

Not sure whether the first commenter really doesn't know what what "stepping up to the plate" means or is just indulging in sarcasm. Aren't there plates in the batters' boxes in cricket?

American discourse is full of sports metaphors, but then so is everyone else's. Do the British still use the term "sticky wicket"?

[steepholm.livejournal.com]

She'll have to speak for herself, but I expect [Unknown site tag] knows more about plates than she's letting on. There aren't plates in cricket, though: the nearest equivalent is the crease, which is the line that the batsman has to stand behind in order to receive balls (or, if making a run, not to be in danger of being "run out"). And yes, there are indeed still sticky wickets!

[steepholm.livejournal.com]

Sorry about the html there - I meant hafren, of course.

[hafren.livejournal.com]

No, she doesn't know more than she is letting on. She doesn't watch cricket either, though she's fairly certain there are no plates or boxes* involved in it, but she has never seen a game of base-ball, either in reality or on the TV. Nobody that I know of plays it here and anyway I hate all team games. It's fascinating that people should be unable to believe anyone isn't so far into bloody sport as to understand its arcane terminology:)

*Actually now I think of it I have heard of "cricketers' boxes". But they are an item of protective apparel, as far as I'm aware - is that right, steepholm? Still no idea what plates are...

[steepholm.livejournal.com]

God knows I'm not the person to ask as an expert about cricket (kalypso_v, are you out there?). But yes, I'm pretty sure that a box in that sense is some kind of armour-plated jockstrap.

I believe the plate is the thing the batter (hitter?) stands on in order to have balls thrown at him in baseball. Whether it's a real plate or a metaphorical one, metal or ceramic, I've no idea - though it hardly matters in the political usage, where I guess it translates to "stand up and be counted", or similar.

[hafren.livejournal.com]

You learn something every day...:)

[a-d-medievalist.livejournal.com]

NOOOOO!! Never on, or the batter can be called out! The batter steps up to, but not onto, the plate. The pitcher (who pitches the ball for the batter try to hit), has to throw the ball over the plate to the catcher (who stands behind the batter in the same way that the wicket-keeper stands behind the wicket and the batsman). But in baseball, since there's no wicket to hit or protect, the pitcher has to make sure that the ball goes over the plate and at a height that falls within a certain range. If the batter can't hit a ball pitched through this 'strike zone' three times, he's out.

Bet that made your eyes glaze over.

ETA: it's made of something rubbery. The only time the batter should touch it is when he's on the way 'home', having rounded all the bases. Then he has to touch it without being tagged with the ball or thrown out (as in cricket, pretty much) to score a run.

It's still not as complicated as cricket -- or as much fun.

[steepholm.livejournal.com]

Well thank you! Another mental image adjusted.